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What you do to meHow can I love you when I have no heart?
When I got rid of it so long ago?
Who are you to do this to me?
You're so fucking perfect and beautiful
In every single way
It frustrates me so that I love you and I have no heart
I want to claw my eyes out yet crawl to you at the same time
You steal my breath and my thoughts
It feels as if I am being dashed against the wall
And offered a cookie at the same time
You will drive me insane
I want to cry tears of blood it hurts so much
My secret loveYou seduce me
You help me to forget
I want a future with you
And that scares me more than anything
I love you
Yet I fear to tell you so
Fear that you will reject me
Leave me alone in the darkness
I want to reach out to you and hold you close and tight
You fill me with such hopes and such fears
All at the same time
I want to know you intimately
Body and soul
Will you love me and help me to forget?
UntitledThat frozen stare
That frozen smile
That frozen heart
Laying in a pool of blood
My tears falling upon your frozen beauty
Holding you close as my body shakes
Sobbing wrecks my whole self
My heart breaking into a million billion pieces
My whole self ripped out and dashed upon the wall
Screaming to the heavens and asking why
Nobody answers me
I lay alone at night curled up tight
My body shaking even under the covers
My tears stain the pillow and sheets
Each day my mind is filled with you
Each day I die a little more inside
Each day my heart breaks a little more
All the things I love and missThe sound of your heartbeat
The sound of a waterfall as we lay under the stars
The sound of your laughter
The gentle caress of a hand upon my skin
The smile even brighter than the rising sun
The tight loving embrace of you
The gentle press of lips upon my own
The short arguments that ended in kissing
The love that drove and lifted me up and beyond
The piercing yet gentle eyes of green
The whispered words in the middle of the night
My HeavenMy heaven lost
My soul damned to wander
Searching for my heaven on earth
My wings burning
My tears flow slowly
The pain of the loss still fresh
My halo shattered into a thousand pieces
My heaven hidden
Those lips I once knew and kissed lost
That smile that I fell in love with gone
Your soul taken too early
My heaven, I miss you...
Am I going insane?I can, only recall one time feeling like this, with my head, my thoughts...slipping away from me. You see, I know I am losing it, that I am going insane. I can feel it, I wonder if others will notice, right now my mind is screaming at me to curl up around my heart tight and keep it safe while I lose the rest of me. I hope that I will be able to come back from this...whatever it is, I truly hope so. But..right now I am not so sure, if I am fully honest with you, to those reading this. My heart, my feelings, my love is entrusted to my most special person, my Kin'va. I..pray that she will hold onto me, help me through what I can feel coming. My thoughts already start to scatter worse and worse, I have to look farther to find them, and hold tighter to them so they do not run away from me. When I go to sleep tonight I just hope that I will wake up still me.
ThoughtsThe slow drip, drip, drip of the tap in the early hours of the morning as the lighting flashes and thunder roars in the distance. I sit here and think upon many things, philosophy, the future, the past and the present all have a place in my thoughts. I wonder how life would be if I had made different choices, wonder how much it would have changed who I am today. Would I still be the same person, seen as a great friend and person by some? Or would I not be? My demon taps gently upon my mind's door, wishing to have words with me. My other half is surprisingly gentle, despite who and what he is, it is in fact I who is not so gentle should I become angry, enraged. I guess I can say in all honesty, those are the times I scare even myself, and I do wonder, for those who have glimpsed this rage, this monster if you will, if they too fear me in those moments. The past lays behind me, all done and dusted as I am sure they say, and the present is now with the future spreading out far into
UntitledMy body and soul are covered in uncountable scares collected in battle. My rage is unceasing, like a tidal wave it consumes me and all those near me. The storm within myself thunders and rages, my blood boiling. I am so angry, so terribly angry and I don't know why. I wonder if this is what it means to be War, to know no peace unless an enemy is facing me and laying dead and bleeding at my feet. I want to kill, just keep going and killing, lose myself in the blissful screams and cries of whoever it is that is dying at my feet. I look at myself in the mirror and I wonder if I am some sort of monster, some sort of beast that lost himself millenna ago. I wonder if I should be locked away, chained up and never let out again. I want to taste the screaming agony of my foes souls and feel their blood wash over my tongue and down my throat. I am a beast, a monster unworthy of anything....
YouYour very touch burns my skin and sets my heart on fire. You tease me with quick looks, hidden smiles and whispered words. I find I cannot pull away from you, no matter how much being near you hurts. Your face and name are seared upon my heart, and each beat I hear your name, see your face in my mind. I am going insane, I know I am and don't tell me any different. You will be the death of me, and I don't think I mind.
I AmI am single,
but I am loved.
I am not a genius,
but I am intelligent.
I am not breathtaking,
but I have beauty.
I am not a saint,
but I am kind.
To the world,
I am not perfect.
But for someone,
Don't pick a fight with an Artist
Don't pick a fight with an artist
Wanna fight pussy?
Give me yar best shot
Or will you throw a paintbrush at me?
I'm so scared- not
Excuse me? What did you say?
What is a punch you ask?
Of course let me tell you:
A blow with the fist- it's quite a simple task
Are y' gonna cwyyy?
I dunno what you just said
Why don't you let me show you?
I'll f****** punch you and then- boom- you're dead!?
Pardon? What did you ask?
You need a clearer definition?
Of course, let me show you
I'll demonstrate- with out your permission
Ouch! Hey no fair
Dude you are so gay
You write poetry
I'll make you f****** pay!
Discúlpeme? What did you mutter?
I'm gay? Is that what you said?
Perhaps you need some assistance, let me help
I'll be gentle I promise- I did need new ink! In the colour red<
All Her Little ThingsStop hating her for the littlest things.
The things she can't prevent,
The things she can't save herself from..
Stop demanding her to do things,
Things she can't accomplish,
Things she can't imagine being done...
Stop lying to her,
Telling her you love her,
Want her, need her...
When all you've ever done is make her want to
Stop hating her for the littlest things.
The things she can't prevent,
The things she can't save herself from...
When those little things you've done
Take her down...
The little things won't matter anymore.
lung canceri will die with your name on my lips
because there is nothing else i'll need to say.
you are my coffin, my funeral pyre.
as my bones disintegrate, popping and snapping,
you will greedily swallow my ashes
until nothing is left of me but secondhand smoke.
i've danced with you, love, across hospital tile,
the scent of antiseptic cloying as valentine's chocolate.
you dipped me into unconsciousness,
and i willingly closed my eyes.
the intrusion of your scalpel teeth no longer scares me.
you, my rigor mortis soul mate, always take me under.
your tent of frostbitten shelter pulls me down, an anchor,
while i gag on pills too abstract to save me.
forgive me, lungs, of my cigarette abuse,
but i've found happiness in a reaper's cloak.
i find comfort in these carcinogens.
i've made my nest in a swaying tree,
my body destroyed by the nauseous rocking.
they smile at me with pity in their eyes,
scribbling nonsense on those jaw-like clipboards.
their crisp, stark white world still has faith in me,
you've been dead for a year, my deari met you on december 21st,
the longest night of the year.
you had solstice eyes: cold, dark, alluring.
i knew you were not meant to last,
powerful as a gale but fragile as
the tulip stems you snapped,
a sickening cycle of you,
an overwhelming tidal wave.
they say two wrongs will never make a right,
but i made so many bad choices that
i wound up back where I began.
it was too easy to love you,
but getting you to love me back was impossible.
i clawed at your chest until I struck blood,
until my nails split into shards.
you were born a phantom,
and i, your corpse.
holding onto you felt like drowning in quicksand;
i fought but always sank into your arms.
i breathed in dirt, breathed in dust, and
found my organs choked with you,
smothered by your existence.
you sucked out my breath
every time i kissed you.
i died every day with your hand
knotted in my hair.
You left on june 21st,
the longest day of the year.
i bit down sorrow and deconstructed
the labyrinth within me,
the one you hadn't th
Mirror, MirrorMirror, mirror, on the wall,
Watch it crumble, break and fall.
Look at all the bloody glass,
How it reminds them of a severed past.
Watch a reflection slowly disappear,
Looking at all the shattered, crushed mirrors.
A breathless state of mind goes by,
Am I just alive or did I die?
Confused and in an awe,
Careless people unknown to what one saw.
Throat slit so one can't be unlocked,
Too bad the thoughts have become blocked.
Crimson splatters, dripping, breaking away,
Thou shall not know the feeling of all the pain.
Oh, Mirror, mirror on the wall,
Why did you crumble, break and fall?
Eye of the StormI believed I could make the wind blow,
and force the moon to shine at night,
create rainbows just by thinking,
and hold tea parties for fairies in July,
I was the queen of my own graceful lands.
Yet, I grew old and realized,
I am the kind of girl who'd trip and fall,
often for stepping on her own feet.
My crown of diamond and gold
now a rusted piece of bronze,
I lost my throne to treason, my kingdom to hate,
I became the eye of a hurricane,
loaded with mishaps I need to atone.
I felt the soft touches of angels,
and lost my own wings to demons who could crush stone.
Felt the scorching tears run so often,
I knew I must have hit bottom low.
I had nothing holy, no one to call dear,
but here I am, the starting point of my own storm.
I felt fear, clung to shadows,
encased my heart within marble walls,
and threw the keys that can unlock my soul.
So many chances I've lost with no love to seek,
and so many people I turned my back to.
I let the darkness gnaw through my bones.
A stranger walked up to me today...A man walked up to me and asked me for a cigarette… I told him I didn't smoke anymore, and he asked me why? ––I answered "because the person I used to smoke with, isn't around anymore", and he replied…"that's why I smoke."
A woman walked up to me and asked me for drugs, I replied "I have several in store…his eyes, his smile, his hands"…she whispered, "that's not a drug"…and I laughed as I said.. "if only you knew."
A child walked up to me today and asked me to play a game, I told them I was too tired to play games, i'd been playing for years, they replied…"then you must be a pro!", to which I said "yes…a pro at losing."
An old woman stared at me today, and I asked her…"is something wrong?" she answered "I was about to ask you the same question."
© Rocio Belinda Mendez
Broken hearted angelLet me lay
Upon the unforgiving earth
Leave me to my pain
Suffering consume me whole
As I burn up inside
My sins consuming me
Ripping my soul asunder
Here I lay upon this concrete
A fallen angel with wings torn off
It's what I deserve
For everything I've done
My life is spent
As the blood runs out
A broken tortured soul in my cracked chest
I feel my life slipping away from me
Pain filled eyes weeping tears of blood
My black sin wrapping tight around me
My still beating broken heart giving its last few beats
There is no one to come and save me
No one to undo what I have done
I feel death creeping closer to me
I weep with unending tears of red
I close my eyes and pray to be saved
Someone please save me.....
Crown of ThornsShe wakes up with red staining her pillow
and the taste of blood like iron in her mouth
It stains her teeth and leaks from her lips, and as she
rinses her mouth out, she can’t help thinking that
it’s better than dirt and ashes
it feels like she’s wearing a noose
of broken promises and shattered glass
that tightens around her throat with every day that passes
She nails a smile to her face
and doesn't let herself think the word dying
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^Nyx-Valentine arrived in our community and started whipping everyone into a frenzy with her relentless desire to bring the Artistic Nude and Fetish galleries to the fore. 9 years later, and it's safe to say that Nyx is not only a leader as a photographer in these galleries, but she has also established herself as a much saught after model. ^... Read More